Discovery of Life
by Erastus
Summary: Harry is unsure of where his life is leading him. In order to find out what is really important he decides to disappear for a while into the wilderness. Rating may change.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or any of the recognised characters or places.**

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**Prologue**

"… _Either must die at the hand of the other, for neither can live while the other survives"_. That was perhaps the only part of the prophecy which truly weighed on Harry's mind. The balance of that statement seemed unjust. Fate was forcing him to end the life of another person in order to continue living. Only due to the other person, if that was still an accurate description of the monster, being Lord Voldemort, does it release the guilt and make it seem somewhat possible to end the life of another.

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**Chapter One: Welcome the Hero**

It was warmer than the typical summer for Surrey. The sun had been relentless in its goal of frying every living thing in its path. The local residents had taken to staying indoors with their air conditioners for the hottest parts of the day, and only emerging for the cool evenings to sit outside to enjoy their perfectly ordinary lives.

On a street which could have blended in with any other of the dozen like it you could find a particular boy. At first glance he would look like a scrawny young teenager, but most definitely not a 15 year old hero – that would be a rather large tag to put on a young man after all. Though at only one year old he had done what was thought to be the impossible, he defeated a man so evil he would kill with no needed reason, a man who would sacrifice his own soul not once, but eight times using the darkest of magic just to insure his immortality.

Unfortunately to the 'normal' and respectable Dursely family with whom he lived, the boy was nothing more than an unwanted nuisance who was only good for doing their house work.

The young Hero, who will henceforth be known as Harry Potter, as that happens to be his name, was in the backyard sweating over his aunt's garden which she wanted completely re-landscaped.

Harry would normally be against doing anything nice for the Durselys, as they definitely did not deserve it. Even though, he was proud of the job he had done. In his two weeks since returning he had completed the rather large list of jobs which his aunt had ordered him to accomplish. There was a certain satisfaction in working hard and having such great results at the end.

Perhaps the one great thing in Harry's life was attending the prestigious, Hogwarts School for Witchcraft and Wizardry, where he will be going into his sixth year. It would be the second last year before he was counted as a fully trained Wizard in the eyes of the British Ministry of Magic. Only those who completed their sixth year of education were able to perform magic outside of their school or they receive a warning Owl from the Ministry. If the offence was seen to be in major violation of this law, they received a summons for a trial.

Last summer this happened to Harry after a Dementor, one of the guards of Azkaban prison, acting under the orders of a high ranking Ministry official, went after Harry near his home. He had to use his wand to cast the Lumos spell in order to find his way from it. Normally a simple lighting spell would not be enough for a summons. However due to Harry's celebrity status and alignment with Dumbledore, he was not particularly popular with the Minister of Magic who would rather use Harry to boost his own political career.

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"Boy, get in here if you want anything to drink or eat anything before dinner! We have guests coming over for lunch and we do not want you around when they arrive" Aunt Petunia screeched at him from the back porch.

"And make sure you clean up before coming in! I have just cleaned the floors and do not want you to muddy them up".

Wiping the sweat from his face, he nodded in affirmation.

"Yes Aunt, I've just finished the last of the weeding anyway".

Harry made his way to the hose near the back door. As he only had one pair of shoes and it was a hot day, he decided to just hose them down on the lawn and put them back on later. At least his feet would stay cool for a while. Once inside he made himself a sandwich with the items his Aunt had left out, and poured a glass of cold water from the fridge.

Enjoying the relative freedom he would have for the morning he told his relatives that he would stay out of the house until the afternoon.

"Good, boy, at least we won't have to cover for you if any of your freakiness happens. This lunch is too important for you to disturb!"

His uncle had still not forgiven him for what had happened during his second year when Dobby had dropped the cake on the head of a rather important guest from his work.

Harry made his way down to the park at the end of the street where he would normally spend most of his time away from the Dursleys. His mind wondered to the events of the last year and the inevitable subject of his Godfather, Sirius, and his death. All of his friends had told him repeatedly that he was not to blame, but they could not understand. He had been deceived by Voldemort by being shown a false scene of him torturing Sirius so Harry, being the fool that he was, would race to his aid. It was his fault for not making more of an effort in Occlumency training with Snape. If he had, he would have been able to, if not block, at least see the memory as a false.

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Working in the garden had given him the drive had needed in distracting his mind from the events, reducing the amount of tension and anger that had built up. The physical exhaustion after a full day of hard labour was exactly what he needed; he would fall asleep as soon as his head hit the pillow. He was still grieving, though without the raw emotion, it was able to be a moderately happy experience in remembering Sirius and the good times they shared during their short time together.

It had not been easy losing the only true parental figure he remembered in life. While Sirius was definitely not the typical parental figure, he was the closest Harry could remember ever having. An adult who actually wanted Harry in their life away from Hogwarts and who didn't treat him like a broken toy that needed coddling. The Weasleys were a fantastic family, he did believe Molly and Arthur truly cared for him, but not in the same way as Sirius. He was one of the last links to what he could have had, also a reminder of what was taken away from him.

Realising where his current train of thought was taking him, he focused on the walk instead. Though the memories of losing Sirius were hurting less, they were still raw.

"Stay focused Harry, you are here and now, you are your own person and will take control of your own life".

That had become a sort of mantra for him in the last week. Once the initial depression had taken over, he realised that it was not what he wanted. Sirius was a happy, fun person who would hate to see Harry beating himself up. Sirius had spent all those years away from happy thoughts, of freedom and even the basic amenities everyone enjoys, yet he had been able to break through that. Harry had never seen him more alive than duelling his cousin Bellatrix, the thrill on his face of making his own choices. That would be how he remembered him.

A smile made its way onto his face. That is how he would remember him.

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**A/N: Please review!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or any of the recognised characters or places.**

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**Chapter 2: Out and About**

Harry really enjoyed just sitting in the park people watching. Pretending he was the young child who was eating a large ice cream which was quickly melting down his hand, while clinging onto his mother with the other. Or envisioning himself as part of a group about his age, listing to music and laughing about something one of them had said. He smiled sadly thinking that he could have been one of them, if only his parents hadn't been taken away from him as a baby. A single selfish person like Tom Riddle could take so much away from an entire generation; but Harry was certain Voldemort never saw it like that, he just wanted power.

"Hello."

Harry looked up. He hadn't even realised there was someone standing next to the bench he was on. She was about his age with light brown hair and strange eyes which were at first glance grey, but on closer inspection had small gold flecks around the iris.

"Hi," he replied lamely.

He hadn't exactly had much experience with talking to people outside of School; most would ignore him due to his apparent reputation that the Durselys had decided was necessary to keep people away from his 'abnormality'.

Seeing his nerves she continued anyway.

"Do you live around here? I have seen you quite a few times, but you normally just keep to yourself".

"Yeah, I live down on Privet Drive but I prefer it in the park whenever I can get out. Sorry, I'm Harry, Harry Potter."

Seeing her eyes widening slightly, he was getting ready for a verbal bashing about him being a crazed loon. It didn't come.

"Oh yes, I have heard about you. Not those silly stories your relatives share around Church of course, but from my father who used to tell me bedtime stories about you when I was younger."

Her face reddened when she realised her sudden confession.

Not sure he was hearing correctly, Harry carefully asked.

"What do you mean? How would your father know about me at all? I'm just a 'nut case' who lives with the last of my family who were kind enough to take me in".

"I'm so sorry, you told me your name but I never told you mine. I'm Ella Saunders. I'm a home schooled Witch from just down the road. My father knows about you as he spent most of his life in the Wizarding world, before meeting my mother who is a Muggleborn. He decided that bringing my sister and me up in a Muggle area would be better for us; he was never one for all that Pureblood nonsenses even though his family are all magical".

Though surprised that another magic user lived so close, Harry could understand why her father would raise his children away from the prejudiced magical community. He thought that in the future if he lived long enough to have a family of his own, he would settle down in a small Muggle village where he could live peacefully. It was a thought that often got him through some of his darker moments while thinking about the war.

Seeing her waiting for a reply, he told her that it was great to have another person to talk to about the Magical world, as he was rather cut off during the holidays.

"Oh, really? I would have thought that Harry Potter would have loads of friends and fans writing to him".

Harry laughed at that and, moving aside, asked Ella if she would like to sit down. He explained that he had never received a single fan letter, and his friends only wrote to him once a week just to see if he was doing ok. He understood why they couldn't write more though; security was pretty high from the Order due to Voldemort coming out into the open with attacks and even smaller raids on politically connected families.

Although he did wonder what happened to fan letters, if anyone did send him any over the years. Privet drive was pretty heavily warded due to his mother's Blood Wards and Owls could not find him unless they already knew the location.

Ella laughed along with him.

"Well it was nice meeting you, Harry Potter; you definitely are not what I expected. I might see you around."

"It was nice meeting you too. I'm here as much as I can get away from the Durselys."

Watching her walk away, Harry was happy that he finally had someone to genuinely talk to while on holidays. It would be interesting to socialise with someone who had a magical education away from Hogwarts. He had only ever met those from the Triwizard tournament and they were competitors who didn't really talk of much other than the event itself.

Deciding that he had stayed out long enough, he made his way back to Privet Drive.

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Walking through the door to number 14, Harry made a beeline straight for his room to avoid uncle Vernon's wrath. His short conversation with Ella had gotten him thinking. Surely there were other things in life than school and sitting in his rather dull bedroom. Why not try and experience them? Everybody expected so much of him, even if they did not realise the content of the prophecy. It was becoming nearly common place for his face to appear on the front of the Daily Prophet. The entire Wizarding population was counting on him to face and defeat Voldemort, while they were happy to cower in their homes. The only way he was going to get some peace was to run away, leave it all behind, if only for a couple of weeks, and have some time to himself. He did not resent Dumbledore or the others; they were only trying to help him after all, but unfortunately they were only succeeding in suffocating his life by imposing unbendable rules.

Of course it would not be easy; he would have to find a way around his ever present guard and a mode of transport other than the Knight Bus, as it was far too easy for him to be tracked. He always had his Invisibility cloak and Firebolt, though with both Dumbledore and Madeye having ways of seeing though his cloak he could not risk them being either on duty or in the area. He would need something far more basic, maybe he could pay Vernon to sneak him out? He did have some Muggle money left over from the school year. This required some more thought.

* * *

Sitting on the bed, he looked around at the sparse fittings – an old wardrobe with a broken door and a small desk with a chair, as well as the bed itself. It was not much to work with, though he always had his magical belongings. It was pretty common knowledge that you could not perform magic outside of school but he couldn't help wondering if brewing a potion could be tracked. As far as he knew the trace was on his wand itself or large amounts of concentrated magic in one area. Now that the garden was complete, he would have some spare time on his hands. Maybe some brewing was in order; it would at least cure his boredom for a few days and allow some time to plan an escape.

Opening his trunk and rummaging through its contents he finally pulled out the book he was after –_Standard Potions Guide: Grade 3._ He remembered a particularly easy potion in this book from his third year, which was coincidentally a favourite of the Weasley Twins who had used variations in their joke products. Basically it duplicated the effects of dizziness. Not a very useful potion normally; it was more the steps involved in making it that allowed it to be considered a third year potion at all. The best thing was, it only required the most basic of ingredients and a couple of hours to brew. Pulling out his potions kit, he removed the necessary ingredients and got to work.


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or any of the recognised characters or places.**

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**Chapter Three: A little Change never hurt**

Brewing potions really was not that bad at all without 'Professor' Snape around. In fact Harry was rather enjoying it as it was a lot like cooking. He was even certain he had done well on his potions OWL, not that he would like another year in Snape's classroom if he were to get the required 'Outstanding' mark.

Double checking the instructions which said to leave it for two hours on a light simmer, Harry moved from the window where he had setup, it was the most ventilated part of his room, to stretch out on his bed. So far he only had a plan to escape from the Durselys and the Order guard. It was actually rather ingenious and a large oversight on Dumbledore's part. Out of the four people who guarded him, Mundungas Fletcher had the most amounts of shifts. Due to his bad habits, he had drawn the short straw of watching Harry after sunset. Harry had seen him out there, normally drunk and asleep. This effectively led him to having no guards for the entire night, unless something was to wake Dung. All he had to do was wait for night to fall and make his escape into the local forest reserve. Unfortunately that was his entire plan at this stage. From there he could decide how to disappear.

He really wanted freedom to do his own thing without anyone watching him. Maybe he could look into purchasing some books that could help him change his appearance, or even warding? That would certainly allow him to move about and have an area to himself. He knew some basic glamour charms, but not much more than covering pimples or changing his hair colour. That reminded him of another rather large problem, his magically knowledge was laughable outside the curriculum taught at Hogwarts. It was defiantly something that had to be remedied if he stood even a small chance of defeating Voldemort, or any his Inner Circle of Death who each had years more experience with combat spells.

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"Right"he told himself.

"Plan of attack so far, wait for Dung to be on guard duty, bolt as fast as possible with only necessary items to the bush line which is four blocks from Privet Drive. Once there, find a way to get the books I need to learn new glamour charms which will allow me to move around in public without being noticed."

It certainly sounded a lot easier before saying it out loud, but he was determined to make it happen.

Choosing to pack light was going to be a slight problem. His wand was a definite, as was his Invisibility cloak. Most of his books would have to stay behind as they were far too heavy. The Firebolt was a must have if only because Sirius had given it to him, he would have to stash that somewhere and come back for it later, he might be able to make it a block or two with it if he stayed to jumping fences in people's backyards until the tree line.

Going through the books in his trunk again and discarding nearly all of them straight away, he decided only on _Household Charms_, _Standard Book of Spells: Grade 6_ and _Advance Charms for the Crafty_. The last of which was a present from Hermione the previous year who had mentioned it had some fantastically useful spells. Packing all of the chosen items up in an old bed sheet, he tied it off like a rucksack and sat it near the window. He would have to wait until after dark before making his move. He also had to grab enough food and water from the kitchen to last maybe three days, once the Durselys would be sufficiently distracted by the afternoon TV shows.

Nearly two hours later and the potion was ready for bottling. It was nearly perfect. The ideal colour and a very thin consistency which would, when impacted against a solid surface, transform into a powder that would cloud the victims mind and make them extremely dizzy for about two minutes. If Dung were to wake, he could use it to give himself a head start on the out of shape, drunken thief. Luckily he had enough for nearly six vials, but unluckily he could not perform an unbreakable charm on them which meant he would have to leave most behind.

Realising that he was ready to go, he checked the old repaired clock on his desk. It only read 6:00pm which meant he still had at least two hours before it would be dark enough. Deciding to get in a bit of last minute study, he settled down with _Advance Charms for the Crafty_ and flicked to the Contents page. Hermione was right; it really did have some freat spells in it. There were a couple he would have to look into right away, like the Muggle Repelling Ward which was able to be cast around an area about the size of a small single story house and a preservation charm that could be cast on food. This made him realise that he would have to find a way to remove the trace on his wand as soon as possible.

On that front he had no idea what he was going to do. The only information he really had on the trace was that it was on every registered wand and was removed once the Wizard hit their seventeenth birthday. He could look into getting a replacement wand that had no tracking charm on it, if they existed, but he had really grown attached to his Holy wand and as Ollivander had said.

"It's the wand that chooses the Wizard"

which meant he may never find a proper replacement. That left having to break the charm, which without being able to do magic in the first place was going to be rather tricky.

Either way it sounded like he would have to go to Diagon Alley. He had to purchase some more books on Warding and glamour, so he may as well pay a visit to Knockturn Alley as well to see if anything could be done about his wand trace. That place was well known for less than legal activity, maybe he would get lucky?

* * *

Realising this was probably going to be the last time he ever saw his relatives, Harry decided that he should probably say something of a farewell to them before leaving. He was not sure they would even care, but it seemed like the right thing to do.

Going down stairs and entering the now free of visitors' living room, the three Durselys were sitting on the couch watching the local TV news. Clearing his throat they turned their attention, Sand seeing who it was glared back at him.

"What do you want boy?" Vernon asked.

Reminding himself that it was the right thing to do, Harry continued.

"I just wanted to tell you that I will most likely be leaving tonight. Forever."

Twin looks of shock passed between Petunia and Vernon.

"What do you mean? You told us that you have to stay here during the holidays; didn't your Principal say you had to?" Petunia asked with a calculating look on her face.

"I have decided that I would like to make my own decisions in life, I am nearly of age and would like to live my own life from now on"

"Well good on you boy, it's about time you grew up and moved out!" Vernon shouted "But don't go thinking we will help you with leaving, we want nothing to do with any of it, or any of you. Once you are gone I don't want to hear from you again".

Holding back a smile, Harry decided that it could not have gone better.

"You won't have to worry about it Uncle, I have it all sorted and as soon as it is dark, I will be gone forever."

Looking to his Aunt to see if her feelings were the same as his Uncles, he realised that she had a very restrained but sad smile on her face. Having no idea what it meant Harry decided to ask her indirectly.

"I know you are my family Aunt Petunia, and I know you want nothing to do with my... World, but for what it is worth, thank you for taking me in all those years ago. You could have just left me there on the step for someone to report, or taken me to the local orphanage."

Her expression changed then, for the first time Harry could remember she looked sad. "Come to the kitchen Harry."

Following her and having no idea what was happening, she turned to him with a small box she had retrieved from one of the top cupboards. Looking at it for a moment, she handed it to him and walked back into the living room leaving him alone.

It was an old box, just a plain shoe box apart from the feminine decorations made from glitter which spelled, very clearly 'Lilly Evans'. Realising this was something of his Mothers, Harry numbly made his way back up to his bedroom where, when he reached his bed, put it down reverently. For what seemed like an hour he just stared at it until he decided to open it. Inside were pictures, letters and various items which had belonged to his Mother. Most were obviously of personal value to her as there were things like preserved flowers and handmade jewellery from beads and pieces of string.

Picking up the top photo, which was a normal Muggle picture, it showed a young Lilly and Petunia smiling back. They seemed so happy; this must have been taken before his Mom was accepted into Hogwarts. He had no idea that they were friends beforehand; these memories must have been the only reason why she held onto the box at all. Deciding that he had to concentrate on his imminent escape, Harry put the box with the other items he would be taking and checked outside to see who was on guard.

* * *

Just as he had thought he would be, Dung was lying outside, and in an attempt at being careful had hidden under a bush. Grabbing his rack sack and climbing out the window, he lowered himself slightly and shimmied down the guttering.

Being careful not to wake the drunken guard, Harry moved quietly to the back of the small backyard which he had just completed and jumped over the fence to number 6. Most of the back yard fences around Privet Drive were under waist height, so with minimal effort he climbed over each one and moved swiftly through each yard. Thankfully due to the hour, he didn't meet anyone on his escape. Within ten minutes he was at the corner of Corningston Road, three blocks from Privet Drive, where he could walk freely on the footpath to the reserve.

The group of trees could hardly be called a reserve, and due to the design of the area it was rarely used which is why he thought of it to start with. Moving into the tree line until he could no longer see house roofs, he quickly found a secluded spot where he could stop and catch his breath.

Sitting quietly and hearing no sounds apart from the birds, Harry relaxed and retrieved some of the food he had stashed earlier. It was while munching on a sandwich that he decided on his mode of transport into London.

The Order would be expecting him to use Magical modes of transport. They, however, would not expect him to stick to the Muggle world. Therefore, he could take a train from any of the local metro stations and be on his way. Checking his pockets, he would have enough to make it to London. Thankful he had decided to hold onto his Muggle money, he made his way out of the reserve to the local station.

Twenty minutes later, after collecting his stashed Firebolt, Harry was standing on the train that would take him close to the Leaky Cauldron. Some of the other passengers gave him a funny look at the broom, but Harry just mumbled that it was a theatre prop before rather awkwardly hiding it behind him. Reflecting on the last couple of hours, the escape had really been too easy. While he definitely respected Dumbledore's abilities, he was not so sure about the other members of the Order; Dung Fletcher was not exactly the most trustworthy of people when left alone, his stealing of Sirius's property and drinking while on duty paid testament to that.

Deciding to only stay in London long enough to break the trace on his wand and stock up on food, he would then find a location where he could live, train and be completely alone to sort out his thoughts on his future.

After a short while, the train pulled up close to where Harry knew Diagon Alley was hidden. There was a nearby hotel which would allow him to stay hidden but venture into the magical world when needed. Booking a room just for one night and unpacking, he made his way to the local shopping district. On the walk down, he came by a camping good store which had a tent in the window with fake camouflage setup around it. He had already used the forest to hide in once, why not use it again? There were bound to be heaps of large areas of land in the UK that were rarely visited. He could easily get to them with the use of his cloak and broom, and when his wand trace was gone, could ward against anyone coming by. It would even give the perfect training location away from towns and cities. After stocking up on food and water, he headed up to the hotel for the night. This plan would require a trip to Gringotts in order to pay for the camping items he would need and he was running low on Muggle money.

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**A/N: Please review! This is my first attempt at writing a fictional story of any sort and I would love some feedback.**


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